I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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