he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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