So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize