Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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