Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize