Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
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More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
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I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
3 2 1 whiskey
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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