ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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