Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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