She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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