let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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