ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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