Dude my mom stole all your condoms
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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