Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
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He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize