I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize