I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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