Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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