sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
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I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
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