i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I touched a dick in church today
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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