I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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