dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize