I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
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this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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