do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
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What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize