So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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