I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Are we still banned from the library?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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