do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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