Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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