How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Green mimosas i think yes
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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