but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I have peed in a lot of sinks
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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