How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
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the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
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I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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