there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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