she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
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