Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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