ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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