i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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