On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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