Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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