What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
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bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
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He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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