i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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