I hate all girls vehemently.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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