You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
God I need to hump something, right now.
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