Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
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I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
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I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize