It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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