I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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