Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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