went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize