I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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