Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize