I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you cant smoke seaweed
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize