im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize