Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
You're a waste of cheezeits
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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